The roles you play at home and work must be in harmony---not requiring you to play different roles.
Although there are distinct competencies attached to each role, it is to your advantage to create a powerful personal synergy among all your roles.
Creating a more holistic paradigm of integration to your work and home life will help you from thinking you are running between very different life segments. The synergy saves you incredible problem-solving time and energy.
Overbooked lives and strong immunity to change try to keep us from relearning deeply ingrained habits. To make our intention a reality takes personal determination, practice, repetition and the support of others.
Pay attention to your intentions. Every year, we gain a clearer understanding that without positive change, decline is inevitable. The challenge is to recognize that what we are now tolerating can be reinvented by paying attention to our intentions.
From where you are to where you want to be. Self-directed learning helps you to discover an ideal vision of yourself, to feel motivated in developing the abilities necessary to get you where you want to be. This becomes the source of the energy required to work at the difficult and often frustrating process of change.
It's tough to do it alone. Find the support to help you get to where you want to be.. Others help us see things we are missing, affirm whatever progress we have made, test our perceptions and let us know how we are doing. They provide the context for our practice of the new rituals. Although the model is called self-directed learning, without others' involvement lasting change can't occur.
Every now and then a person runs across a great book that really helps improve the quality of life. This is such a book! Written by top coaches of executive women, Barb McEwen and John Agno, the goal of When Doing It All Won’t Dois to develop solutions and strategies to help women’s lives be easier, richer, happier, and saner.
It’s based on the premise that doing it all won’t do. If you are a woman who is weary and stressed and taking on too much and struggling to juggle it all, this book is dedicated to helping you find the enjoyment and satisfaction you expected with your success.
Well-organized with real solutions and a helpful workbook section, this book focuses on developing your signature talents to do what you do best, developing a formula for success, and prioritizing your values and goals. A great read!
Writing things down on a "To Do" list is a good first step, but it's not enough.
Instead of allowing our mind to perform optimally, many of us fill our brains with life's mundane details and rules. Worse, we spend endless hours thinking about the tasks and projects we're trying to juggle.
To cope, we put them on "the list" which often grows faster than we can tick off the items. We need a functional system to hold these details until the appropriate time to take action.
Some will choose to computerize their lists and if that is your choice there are a number of resource tools online. Others will simply want to write their "To Do" list the old fashioned way. The key is that once you make your list, it is important to prioritize each item....and then follow the ranking.
Don't let your "To Do" list grow faster than you can tick off the items by eliminating nice-to-do things, noncritical or small things. Also, don't just glance at the list once a day but refer to and revise your list throughout the day.
Simply divide your list into three sections: urgent & important, important but not urgent, and urgent and not important (those that can be delegated to others or taken care of after you have begun to handle the "important" items).
Since it is unlikely that you will achieve all your priorities in one day, simply include those left undone and re-prioritize for the next day. Be careful not to add too many things to do without priority and time considerations (to guard against feeling less than competent).
Ensure your "To Do" list is to be made up of single-step actions not assignments. Major projects need to be broken down into specific action plans with detailed tasks.
Don't try to keep multiple "To Do" lists. When you write down the task yet again, you are blocking your mind from thinking clearly and creatively. The left-brain, that supplies logic and linear thinking, keeps its own list and tends to be untrusting of your multiple "To Do" lists.
Above all, be in alignment with your list. That includes high priority personal items that give you work/life balance: going to the gym, calling a friend, going to your child's event, or spending quality time with your life partner.
Every now and then a person runs across a great book that really helps improve the quality of life. This is such a book! Written by top coaches of executive women, Barb McEwen and John Agno, the goal of When Doing It All Won’t Dois to develop solutions and strategies to help women’s lives be easier, richer, happier, and saner.
It’s based on the premise that doing it all won’t do. If you are a woman who is weary and stressed and taking on too much and struggling to juggle it all, this book is dedicated to helping you find the enjoyment and satisfaction you expected with your success.
Well-organized with real solutions and a helpful workbook section, this book focuses on developing your signature talents to do what you do best, developing a formula for success, and prioritizing your values and goals. A great read!
We all have the same 24 hours in each day. We can either use our time wisely or squander it away. Once the day is gone, it will never return.
As the old saying goes, “The days can feel long, but the years are all too short.” Effective managers discipline themselves to use their time well. Those who don’t will likely be replaced by those who can.
The first step in eliminating time wasters is to identify them:
1. Unproductive Meetings are unnecessary or held in such a way or at such a time that they fail to deal with their desired objectives—or, sometimes, no objectives at all. Consider how things could be done differently.
2. Firefighting or Crisis ManagementWork disruptions speak loudly of management ineffectiveness. They often happen when we allow ourselves to be distracted. Too often we deal with the urgent, but not necessarily the important.
3. Lack of Delegation Ineffective delegation happens because someone believes that direct reports are incapable of doing a satisfactory job. This methodology is flawed. Good supervisors create a learning environment and develop, mentor, and train those on their team.
4. Inability to FocusThis happens when we allow our minds to wander. This can occur when our minds are most productive and creative. One idea evolves into two or three more ideas. The process is exciting, but let’s face it, the process is also unproductive if we have things we have to accomplish.
5. Shifting Priorities Planning and goal setting will prevent us from shifting our priorities from one project to the next at short notice.
6. Interruptions When you have an "Open Communication Policy" but fail to manage your time, interruptions can happen constantly: drop in visitors, unscheduled meetings, excessive coffee breaks, long lunches, personal commitments, or socializing. Block out times when you intend to work on highly focused initiatives and do not allow interruptions during these times unless there is an extreme emergency.
7. Technological Interruptions Modern technology is actually designed to interrupt our day, our plans, and our thought processes. Non-important phone calls, emailing, Internet searches, and social networking can happen all too frequently when we work without a schedule. There is a time and a place for these, but not when they prevent you from making the best use of your time and energy.
8. A Simple Word with Great Power: “No” When we avoid a direct and conclusive answer—usually that answer being “No”—we signal that we are a people pleaser and that we will allow the agenda of others to take over our own precious time, energy, and resources. Often the failure to say no means that we have just accepted a task that will make us do more than others in a similar position.
9. Exhaustion It doesn’t get any better if we repeatedly take on more than we can reasonably be expected to accomplish. When we are exhausted, we shortchange ourselves and our personal lives, which means that we have less renewable energy. And when we’re exhausted, we don’t do our best work; we expend more effort to accomplish what needs to be done and we shortchange the project.
10. Commuting Think about ways to use to your advantage minutes or hours that seem wasted. If you have an hour’s drive time, for example, use it for think time, for planning your daily activities, for listening to motivational or book audios. Air travel time can be used for reading, reviewing reports, sending emails. During airport waits, return calls. If you are in a carpool line waiting for children to emerge from schools or lessons, bring a book to fill your minutes constructively or create a “To Do” list.
Sources: Women and Time (ebook for $.99 or paperback for $7.99)
Every now and then a person runs across a great book that really helps improve the quality of life. This is such a book! Written by top coaches of executive women, Barb McEwen and John Agno, the goal of When Doing It All Won’t Dois to develop solutions and strategies to help women’s lives be easier, richer, happier, and saner.
It’s based on the premise that doing it all won’t do. If you are a woman who is weary and stressed and taking on too much and struggling to juggle it all, this book is dedicated to helping you find the enjoyment and satisfaction you expected with your success.
Well-organized with real solutions and a helpful workbook section, this book focuses on developing your signature talents to do what you do best, developing a formula for success, and prioritizing your values and goals. A great read!
"Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least." Goethe
We promise ourselves that next time we'll just work a little harder or do it a little better. We can't cut anything out because, "It's all important!" We'll just get up a little earlier or go to bed a little later.
When we inevitably fail, we blame ourselves because, like Superwoman, we can't run faster than a speeding bullet, aren't more powerful than a locomotive, and don't leap tall buildings in a single bound. And our stress levels rise. It impacts us and it impacts those around us.
The truth is we're trying to do too much. And any juggler can only juggle so many balls in the air before they all come crashing down. When we don't learn the lessons, our problems just change clothes and march back into our lives.
"Not everything is important." When we say that everything is important it becomes impossible to prioritize. This irrational belief scatters our attention and defuses our focus. Allow yourself to recognize that not everything is important.
Work Smarter, Not Harder. Only Superwoman can juggle it all. Say to yourself, "Working harder doesn't work for me. I need to do it smarter. I need to choose what is important and make good solid managerial choices."
Leadership is all about getting things done through others. People are anxious to follow those who have a vision. Use your leadership skills to get others to do the things that you need done. These will be things that can be easily delegated to others.
Every now and then a person runs across a great book that really helps improve the quality of life. This is such a book! Written by top coaches of executive women, Barb McEwen and John Agno, the goal of When Doing It All Won’t Dois to develop solutions and strategies to help women’s lives be easier, richer, happier, and saner.
It’s based on the premise that doing it all won’t do. If you are a woman who is weary and stressed and taking on too much and struggling to juggle it all, this book is dedicated to helping you find the enjoyment and satisfaction you expected with your success.
Well-organized with real solutions and a helpful workbook section, this book focuses on developing your signature talents to do what you do best, developing a formula for success, and prioritizing your values and goals. A great read!
“In truth, people can generally make time for what they choose to do; it is not really the time, but the will that is lacking.” Sir John Lubbock
Women have been conditioned to believe there is a never-ending list of things they “have to do.” Since childhood, we have been taught to believe that hard work, determination, and looking after others will get us what we want in life—whether or not we happen to have nurturing natures.
As coaches,we routinely hear that many of our female clients allow others to set expectations for them.
Often an employee just has to say, “I can't do this,” or “I haven’t the time,” and the female manager begrudgingly takes on yet another job. We do it because we’re used to picking up, whether for our family or our direct reports. Because we are expected to act motherly or womanly, we fall into the “taking care” trap, often to our disadvantage.
Every now and then a person runs across a great book that really helps improve the quality of life. This is such a book! Written by top coaches of executive women, Barb McEwen and John Agno, the goal of When Doing It All Won’t Dois to develop solutions and strategies to help women’s lives be easier, richer, happier, and saner.
It’s based on the premise that doing it all won’t do. If you are a woman who is weary and stressed and taking on too much and struggling to juggle it all, this book is dedicated to helping you find the enjoyment and satisfaction you expected with your success.
Well-organized with real solutions and a helpful workbook section, this book focuses on developing your signature talents to do what you do best, developing a formula for success, and prioritizing your values and goals. A great read!
A new book, "THE MORE YOU DO, THE BETTER YOU FEEL" by David Parker, offers powerful strategies for overcoming procrastination; through utilizing both cognitive and behavioral techniques for people who are struggling with procrastination and disorganization in their lives.
When habitual procrastination is allowed to grow unchecked, it can overtake its victims. As a result of an ever-mounting number of undone tasks, the procrastinator may feel guilty for his or her self-inflicted predicaments, and overwhelmed by the person's emotions, which can combine to the point where s/he feels helpless and hopeless.
Imagine a person who only takes care of his or her responsibilities when forced to.
Try to picture this person in your mind. How would s/he describe themselves to someone else? Do you think s/he would call themselves a "take-charge" individual? Do you think s/he would be in good spirits, or might s/he feel low? What would s/he look like? Would s/he look cheerful and in control, or might s/he cast their head down--as though perpetually gazing at their shoes?
Avoidance and anxiety ruled the roost, and while s/he's "to-do" list might have contained only a few complicated tasks, the majority of it was comprised of less important tasks. As time passed, the "to-do" list became the "things I hadn't done" list.
Simple tasks turned into tremendous burdens, complicated tasks seemed impossible to deal with, and one only dealt with tasks when faced with the threat of severe penalties, or because other people or institutions required actions.
Because loss of interest in normal everyday activities is a common symptom of depression in some individuals, procrastination can actually cause depression.
Because procrastination can be more of a "hidden problem" in contrast to many of the more typical problems that a therapist usually encounters, the therapist may not see the connection between the patient's depression and the procrastination which may be causing their depression. And so, there is the potential that no substantial progress in the patient's fight against depression may be made.
When you don't feel connected to your tasks, it's easy to become distracted and to float away from them. In order to put an end to your habit of floating, you'll need to consider taking up a new behavior, one that's the opposite of floating, which will help you stay grounded in reality.
To help overcome floating and habitual procrastination, this simple technique can easily keep you focused on "just one task" at a time. That technique is just one of the methods to learn and practice in the book, "THE MORE YOU DO, THE BETTER YOU FEEL."
For specific "things to do" on time management, self-knowledge and other important subjects, consider purchasing one or more of the paperback or ebooks below including the "Workbook Edition" of "When Doing It All Won't Do: A Self-Coaching Guide for Career Women:" (Paperback Edition for $13.09)
Increasing technological advances tend to be the consequence of living where everybody is trying to do more in less time. Conversations are routinely interrupted by cell phones and text messaging, people are pressing one another to be constantly available and world-wide access means many people are holding very early morning or very late evening meetings.
Our research tells us that it is a mistake to believe that time management is simply about working more effectively, prioritizing or planning ahead. It is all of that and much more. Of significance is doing what is important, using your strengths, disciplining yourself to stay focused, and having the ability to say 'no.'
To be more effective, most organizations and individuals believe they need to focus on improving their time management skills when what they really need to concentrate on are personal choices. As executive coaches, who help people to live a better life by taking control of their own behavior, we know this will take some dedication---but the benefits will be worth every bit of your effort.
The meaningful and practical recommendations, in theself-coaching booksbelow, will allow you to get to where you want to be both in your personal and professional life. What operates in the background of our time management behavior is discussed in these books to help you learn what you don't know about how you make choices and compromises.
It is our hope that by selectively applying these time management insights, you'll be able to gain a better work/life balance.
Childhood leaves us with some deep-rooted thoughts and behaviors. Society fuels our need for conformity and defines acceptable boundaries.
Corporate culture reinforces the best and the worst of both of these things.
While corporations offer programs and opportunities to work smarter, focus on what is important, take risks, and contribute to a job you enjoy, corporate culture frequently positively reinforces harder workers who react to urgency, are scared to take risks, and continue in jobs they don't enjoy because they need to make a living and don't want to piss anyone off.
Gayle Hilgendorff spent more than 20 years as an overworked professional who poured her heart and soul into her job, only to be denied a promotion because management felt she worked too hard. After years of sacrificing her health, marriage and personal relationships for her job, Gayle decided to reevaluate and take her life back. In doing so, Gayle found a practical approach to life balance that works. Now, Gayle helps others to find their balance.
Instead of making drastic changes, such as cutting work time or switching jobs,Live More, Work Betterguides readers through making small changes on a daily basis. It's a quick read that people can complete in a few hours, act on tomorrow and enjoy immediate results.
You can learn to manage your time and your life in a way that will give you peace, a sense of fulfillment, and the strength to give yourself permission to do what is best for you.
Hope encourages us to see beyond the present. Hope motivates us to gain the self-knowledge necessary to implement positive change. This self-awareness gives us the patience to develop our signature talentsinto personal strengths.
The more self-knowledge we have, the more motivation for change we will have, and the more change we incorporate into our lives, the more satisfied we will become with our life.
Believe that your situation can change and you are halfway down the road to making significant changes. Know that change always comes bearing unexpected gifts. Change starts with the right attitude and the motivation to reclaim your time and your life!
For specific "things to do" on time management, self-knowledge and other subjects, consider purchasing the paperback "Workbook Edition" of "When Doing It All Won't Do: A Self-Coaching Guide for Career Women:"
Every now and then a person runs across a great book that really helps improve the quality of life. This is such a book! Written by top coaches of executive women, Barb McEwen and John Agno, the goal of When Doing It All Won’t Dois to develop solutions and strategies to help women’s lives be easier, richer, happier, and saner.
It’s based on the premise that doing it all won’t do. If you are a woman who is weary and stressed and taking on too much and struggling to juggle it all, this book is dedicated to helping you find the enjoyment and satisfaction you expected with your success.
Well-organized with real solutions and a helpful workbook section, this book focuses on developing your signature talents to do what you do best, developing a formula for success, and prioritizing your values and goals. A great read!
Incredibly, nearly all the people in our lives have subtle, or not so subtle, expectations of us.
Some expect us to do certain tasks. Others expect us to act in certain ways or to respond to certain situations in a prescribed manner. We have accepted some of those expectations willingly, even joyfully, while others under protest. Deep down inside, we need to admit that we cannot possibly meet all the expectations heaped upon of us.
We know that the more we try, the more disappointed we become in our inability to satisfy them all.
On top of the expectations from others, we also have our own expectations. Some are rooted in the way we were raised, some are influenced by our gender, and some are misperceptions about how someone in our position is expected react. Let’s take a closer look into these expectations—we may be surprised at what we see.
In our culture, women have been raised to be caring, flexible, intuitive, facilitating, and cooperative. We see what needs doing and we aren’t shy about getting it done. These are terrific characteristics. They are skills that women have been socialized to provide, and they are valuable in business. Unfortunately, these expectations wedge women in a double bind.
Even though we might like to compete and hit home runs, we are still expected to emulate society’s ideal of what our role should be: to behave properly, love babies, entertain beautifully, excel in the kitchen, keep a smoothly running and attractive home, remember all family birthdays and anniversaries, remember all family members’ appointments, volunteer, tutor the children, carpool, prepare for holidays, serve as timekeeper for the family schedules, plan vacations and parties, and serve as the entertainment coordinator. And this list is an over-simplification!
Having said that, even though we have been told we can be anything we want to be, as we enter the workplace, we soon discover the Catch-22: no matter how stellar our performance, we are still expected to conform to societal norms. We must host wonderful social events, smooth over bumpy relationships, cooperate even when it is inconvenient, know our place, and complete our tasks in a timely manner. And the workplace doesn’t give a woman credit for balancing work and home.
All the while, at home, most women are given little or no credit for their demanding role at work. We are still expected to be a supportive wife, an exceptional mother, a good friend, a happy homemaker, an effective community volunteer, and an ideal daughter.
What can we to do about all these expectations? Panic? Run away? Drop everything? Grin and bear them?
In the past, those might have been our options, but we’re here to tell you that you can do what you need to do, and still have time to do those things you want to do.
Choose what is right for you.
Let’s face it, it is impossible to be all things for all people.
Acknowledging that fact, we must decide what activities and priorities are most important. Our list may fluctuate frequently, and it definitely will change over time, but we need to be aware that we are making a choice—even if we do nothing more than retain the status quo. Keeping our priorities in mind will help us make good choices in the use of our time, energy, and resources. People who have satisfying lives have chosen to be in the driver’s seat of their lives; they choose what they truly desire, and then they act on their choices.
Every now and then a person runs across a great book that really helps improve the quality of life. This is such a book! Written by top coaches of executive women, Barb McEwen and John Agno, the goal of When Doing It All Won’t Dois to develop solutions and strategies to help women’s lives be easier, richer, happier, and saner.
It’s based on the premise that doing it all won’t do. If you are a woman who is weary and stressed and taking on too much and struggling to juggle it all, this book is dedicated to helping you find the enjoyment and satisfaction you expected with your success.
Well-organized with real solutions and a helpful workbook section, this book focuses on developing your signature talents to do what you do best, developing a formula for success, and prioritizing your values and goals. A great read!
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