Kate Matheny isn't exactly someone who shies away from stress. Throughout her career, the Aurora, Colo., certified public accountant has pursued a progression of high-pressure management jobs. "I'm hard core," says the 44-year-old wife and mother of two. "I wanted to be on top of the food chain [at work], and I wanted to be a great mom"—one who could attend lacrosse games, drive carpool and help with homework even after an hour-long commute and workdays that started, more often than not, with a 5 a.m. marathon-training run.
That is, until she hit the proverbial wall.
After months of losing sleep, dropping weight and "feeling pushed to the brink of losing my mind" by her juggling act, Ms. Matheny decided she had to address her stress—and turn it to her advantage. The new job she recently switched to still has its share of pressure, but with more support from her boss and more flexibility in her schedule, she says she feels great.
Contrary to popular belief, stress doesn't have to be a soul-sucking, health-draining force. But few people know how to transform their stress into the positive kind that helps them reach their goals.
Recent research confirms that gaining control over job demands, doing work that lends meaning and purpose to life and enjoying support and encouragement from co-workers are all linked to beneficial stress. Simply changing attitudes and expectations about stress—through coaching, training or peer-support groups—can also foster the constructive kind of stress.
Today’s women are better educated than ever before. They have accumulated a wealth of skills, have learned to be adaptable, and have been told that they can do anything they want to do. The upside is that they have become independent, self-sufficient, and confident of their abilities. The downside is that they will readily admit they have not found the enjoyment or satisfaction they once imagined. The reason they attribute to the problem is that they have taken on too much. These days, most women dance to a frenzied beat, believing just because they can, they think they should.
This has led women to become frustrated by experiencing long days and a never-ending “To Do” list. All too often, businesswomen don’t give themselves a break. In an effort to squeeze even more into their nightmarish schedules, they make choices that actually undermine their health, their family life, their careers, and important relationships.
Hope encourages us to see beyond the present. Hope motivates us to gain the self-knowledge necessary to implement positive change. This self-awareness gives us the patience to develop our signature talents into personal strengths. The more self-knowledge we have, the more motivation for change we will have, and the more change we incorporate into our lives, the less stress and more satisfied we will become with our life. Self-knowledge is the operant word.
This self-coaching guide for career women is dedicated to all those hardworking women everywhere who are willing to embrace liberating change. Believe that your situation can change and you are halfway down the road to making significant changes. Know that change always comes bearing unexpected gifts. Change starts with the right attitude and the motivation to reclaim your time and your life!
For specific "things to do" on time management, self-knowledge and many other career subjects, please consider purchasing the paperback "Workbook Edition" of "When Doing It All Won't Do: A Self-Coaching Guide for Career Women:"
Barbara A. McEwen: When Doing It All Won't Do: A Self-Coaching Guide for Career Women--Workbook Edition (paperback)
John Agno: When Doing It All Won't Do: A Self-Coaching Guide for Career Women (ebook edition)
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