Coaching Tip: The Leadership Blog

Exposing the Myths of Working Women

Women love lists of what they have to get done.  There are too many things for her to do before she can relax. The more exhausted she feels, the more urgent it becomes for her to get everything done.

As an executive coach of working women, I know in a woman's brain there will always more to do.  It seems that Marcus Buckingham knows this also and has written a new book about what the happiest and most successful women have in common.  Here are five myths that Buckingham reports about the lives of working women:

Myth:  With better education, jobs and pay, women are happier and more fulfilled.

Surveys of more than 1.3 million men and women reveal that women are less happy compared with 40 years ago, and compared with men.

Myth:  Children want to spend more time with their working mothers.

1,000 kids were asked what they wanted from working moms.  10% said "more time."  More than a third wanted mom "less stressed and tired."

Myth:  Women are relegated to lower-level roles at work.

In fact, 37% of women hold managerial positions today, vs. 31% men.

Myth:  Flexible work options like paid leave allow women to feel happier at work.

Studies show a negative correlation between taking advantage of such options and a woman's self-reported daily happiness.

Myth:  Women would prefer to work for other women.

About 40% of women want to work for men, while 26% prefer a female boss.

 Marcus Buckingham: Find Your Strongest Life: What the Happiest and Most Successful Women Do Differently

Women's Wages Outpace Men's

The wages of the typical woman who had a job during the worst recession in decades rose faster than those of the typical man, new data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics show.

Over the past two years, the wages of the median woman--at the statistical middle--rose 3.2% when adjusted for inflation.  Wages of the median man rose 2%.  Minority men were particularly hard hit, while minority women and highly educated women of all races did better.

There were about 8.2 million fewer full-time wage and salary workers in the third quarter than two years ago; the data don't include part-time or self-employed workers.  "This is a situation where everyone's losing but men are losing more, and that's not really a victory for women," said Heidi Shierholz of the Economic Policy Institute, a left-leaning Washington, D.C., think tank.

"It's risky to make too much of these fluctuations," said David Autor, an economics professor at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.  "That said, male employment has been in relative decline for some time, and I would not be at all surprised that the industries and occupations in which males are most concentrated have been hit relatively hard by the recession."

Wages of full-time workers in the top 10% grew much faster during the two-year recession (9.5% before adjusting for inflation) than those of workers in the bottom 10% (5.2% before adjusting for inflation).

Source: The Wall Street Journal, October 17, 2009

Some women are considering going into business on their own....

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How to protect your nest eggs during this great recessionary period:

In every disaster, only a very few people prepare themselves beforehand. Think about investor enthusiasm in 2005-2007, and you'll realize it's true.

Financial analyst Robert Prechter warns that the doors to financial safety are closing all over the world.  He believes prudent people need to act while they still can.

To coincide with the release of the second edition of Prechter's New York Times best-selling book, Conquer the Crash, these 8 free lessons share some of the most valuable, still-prescient knowledge from the original text.

I encourage you to learn more about Prechter's Conquer the Crash. EWI's free "Conquer the Crash Collection" is the perfect place to start.

Learn more, and get immediate access to the 8-lesson "Conquer the Crash Collection" here.  

Woman Leadership Empowerment Through Mentoring

As of January, IBM began empowering employees to reach across its global empire with the click of a button for advice on everything from preparing for a promotion to learning how to innovate.

The changes reflect the company's effort to become a truly global enterprise that relies on cross-border information--sharing and collaboration.  "It became obvious that we had to make mentoring a tool for transferring knowledge globally," says Sheila Forte-Trammell, an IBM human resources consultant who helped launch the initiative.

Any IBM employee can now sign up to give or receive advice by filling out a profile in a Web-based directory called BluePages.  Think of it as Match.com for mentoring.  In less than two months, 3,000 people have joined.

Emerging women leaders outside IBM are also using the Internet to develop global mentoring relationships at www.WomanLeadership.com

Visit Women Leadership Network

Source: BUSINESSWEEK, March 23, 2009

Gaining Greater Self-Knowledge

Ayurveda, which literally means "knowledge of life and longevity," is a system of holistic medicine developed more than 7,000 years ago by the rishis, India's great physicians, physicists, and theologians.  The rishis authored Hinduism's oldest sacred texts, the Vedas.  Ayurveda is a cosmic blueprint for creating overall health, with principles deeply rooted in honoring the intricate balance between the body, mind, spirit and rhythms of the universe.  The greatest purpose in life is to experience complete awareness.  Healing is a reality that is happening at every moment of our lives if we are aware of it.

In Wise Earth Ayurveda (www.wisearth.org), cultivating inner awareness is accomplished in part through sadhanas--conscious practices that connect us to the Divine, to nature, and to ourselves.  A sadhana can be a formal meditation or the creation of a wholesome meal for your family.  Many sadhana prompt a pause from everyday life, particularly important for those struggling with illness.

Living with Awareness

"When we are in touch with the divinity within us," says Maya Tiwari author of the groundbreaking work Ayurveda: A Life of Balance, "we become free.  We have a sense of freedom in expression, of lightness within, freedom of not being so compelled to live the goal-oriented, stress-driven lives that we all contribute to.  Health begins to become more center-poised, and we are then quickly able to separate what serves us from that which does not.  The main thing in life is no longer the accomplishment of specific goals at any cost.  One of the things that women in particular endure today is a total inundation of stress, even with the holistic work they are doing.  Everything seems to get fit into an already overdriven life.  There's only one thing that we can control in the human life, and that one thing is not our mind.  It's not a thought, it's not our breath, it's not our responses, it's not our actions.  It is the cultivation of personal awareness, the moment-to-moment awareness of who we are--in charge of our life, in charge of our purpose, in charge of our path."

Periodically we need to ask ourselves these difficult questions:

1. What has led to my unhappiness, and which dreams are not being realized? 

2. Do these dreams come from the desire to fulfill a worldly goal, or are they coming from a longing to accomplish the path and purpose of who I really am?

"There is a significant difference between doing what we feel obligated to do and doing what our inner self is truly calling us to do," Maya Tiwari explains.  "And that clarity comes from awareness."

Source: SHIFT: At the frontiers of consciousness, Winter 2008

Women: Master Multitaskers

You may think you're getting your life under control by becoming a master mutitasker, but that habit actually may hinder your progress. 

It can take up to 50% more time to complete tasks when you switch between them than to complete one thing at a time, according to a study in the Journal of Experimental Psychology.  Why not begin practicing the "10 minute rule" where you work on each task for at least ten minutes?  Once a task is started, you just may be able to finish it in ten minutes.

Managing your time comes down to organizing, prioritizing and planning, including figuring out how you will handle those inevitable interruptions.  Taking time to do a quality job and doing that job right the first time may take more time up front, but can eliminate the errors caused by rushing or multitasking which take longer to correct.

Productivity experts offer a strategy for the clutter addicts that seek their help: the "D" system.  It's a series of steps to prioritize your tasks, says Laura Stack, president of Productivity Pro, a consulting firm in Highlands Ranch, CO, specializing in productivity improvement.  Stack suggests that every document and email you receive should be discarded, delegated, done, dated (when you will do it), drawered (immediately filed), or deterred (from returning to you again and again).  "Be more decisive and stop shuffling paper," says Stack.

Create a time budget by determining what tasks you do daily, weekly, and monthly, and how much time it generally takes to complete these tasks.  You can hurry through this step and guess, but you may be surprised at how much time some duties are eating up.  For one week, record everything you do in a day and how long it takes.  Your time budget will give you an idea of where you can save time...and...then use this saved time to prioritize and plan.

Source: BusinessWeek SmallBiz, February 2008

Women Leaders in Government

The number of women in state government leadership positions is on the rise, with the percentage nearly mirroring their representation in the general population in six states, according to a report by the Center for Women in Government & Civil Society at the University at Albany, NY.

Of the governor-appointed posts in all 50 states last year, 35% were held by women, up from 28% a decade earlier.  "The most important thing is the fact that in 36 of the states, women are doing better, I mean as a comparison of the percentage of women in leadership posts compared with the percentage of women in the state," said Judith Saidel, the lead author and the center director.

In Alaska, Connecticut, Montana, Nevada, Vermont and Washington, the number of women in senior policy positions is roughly even with their percentage of the general population in those states, the study found.  Agencies in areas where women have traditionally been better represented--including health, human rights and education--still have the highest number of women in leadership.

Source: The Associated Press, August 12, 2008

The Glass Ceiling

While 95 percent of 2,521 American workers believe women have made important advancements in the workplace over the last ten years, 86 percent also believe that the glass ceiling is still in place, according to the Women in the Workplace survey by Harris Interactive, Rochester, NY.

For women executives mentoring other women, go to: www.WomanLeadership.com 

The Women Leadership Network is an example of how executive women networks are emerging in the corporate world to use their creative smarts and Internet-based technology to counter the old boy's club.  Women are also beginning to mentor other women on how to advance and succeed doing powerful and interesting work...while living a fulfilling personal life.

If you know women executives in your organization who need to become better and more creative leaders, suggest you point them toward:  www.executivewoman.info

Dress Code Lesson

It's dangerous for men to weigh in on women's professional dress.  To be sure, many people hate dress codes, no matter who imparts the information.

When it comes to setting and enforcing dress codes in the workplace, it isn't the message but the messenger.  What might sound like a mentor's advice coming from a woman can feel like oppression coming from a man.  This is because what we are really dealing with here is power--the power of executives, who are often men, to inflict attitudes toward dress, professionalism and sexuality on subordinates, who are often women.

"Business casual" has opened the door to more questionable office attire.  At the same time, people are more aware of discrimination and more worried about saying the wrong thing.  Yet, learning the dress code of a workplace is a normal part of professional growth.  When male managers avoid communicating with women employees, women are left unaware of unwritten rules.

Female Executives' Leadership Labyrinth

Many female executives are "getting lost in the leadership labyrinth."

No matter what you call it, the problem of gender inequality persists, but today more corporate leaders and employment consultants are offering programs to help women finally reach their goals.

Mentoring and coaching is crucial for women who need to see how others have navigated their way through the leadership labyrinth.  Mentoring helped her rise to her present position, says Rosa Berg, director of the Tax Shelter Annuity Contact Center of the Minot, ND, division of ING, headquartered in Amsterdam with its main U.S. office in New York.  "Four years ago, a career development manager and I looked at areas where I should further expand my skills and reached out to an individual who had those qualities to be my mentor," Ms. Berg says.

Their mentoring relationship lasted two years, during which time she provided Ms. Berg with help navigating the organization, introduced her to others and provided guidance and support.  Today, Ms. Berg herself is a mentor to three ING employees.

Those efforts drew the attention of Catalyst, a New York nonprofit research and advisory organization that works to expand opportunities for women in business.  ING was one of its 2008 award winners in business.  Julie Nugent, Catalyst's director of research, says, "Women still face many barriers in our workplaces.  We showcase organizations that have excellent women's initiatives, in hopes that they will become models of best practices that will lead to changes for women across all our businesses."

Then, perhaps, the leadership labyrinth itself will disappear and be replaced by a smooth and equal route to the top.

Source: The Wall Street Journal, June 10, 2008

The Glass Ceiling

While 95 percent of 2,521 American workers believe women have made important advancements in the workplace over the last ten years, 86 percent also believe that the glass ceiling is still in place, according to the Women in the Workplace survey by Harris Interactive, Rochester, NY.

For women executives mentoring other women, go to: www.WomanLeadership.com

Executive Womens' Life & Career Focus

Maria Bartiromo of CNBC once spoke at a General Electric (GE) women's meeting about--investing, the Fed, inflation and Wall Street.  She did a fine job in her presentation, and then was asked the question, "How she has succeeded so well in face of all the prejudices and attitudes toward women on Wall Street?" by one of the "work-life balancers."

She answered the question succinctly, saying--as a look of real fatigue crossed her face--"I work very, very, very hard."

You can spot the real players by the focus of their questions.  The good women executives are impatient with all the "women stuff," and will interrogate a speaker on purely business issues.  The drones prefer to whine on about discrimination or work-life balance.

As politically incorrect as it may have been, and even more so now, is that if you want to be a big player in this game of business, your job has to be the primary focus of your life.  Successful women at GE and other companies have been told, or signaled:

1.  do not have a family

2.  have a husband who will stay home and take care of the children

3.  make the children the second priority in your life and hope they will muddle through

4.  understand that the children will probably be drinking and smoking weed while you are having a dinner meeting in Tokyo or Shanghai.

Companies that overindulge in work-life balance are going to be undercompetitive.

In their book, Winning, Jack and Suzy Welch offer some very good advice for "moms": "So before you open your mouth for a fiftieth time to ask for limited travel and Thursday mornings off, or occupy your boss's time with concerns over your childcare arrangements, know that you are making a statement, and no matter what words you use it sounds like, 'I'm not really into this.'"

The history at many workplaces tells us that women seldom supported each other at any level, from "admin" to officer and in fact, were much tougher and more critical with each other than the guys ever were toward women---or toward other men, where their relationships were generally collegial. 

The above should transfix women who are starting out in life and career.

Source:   Bill Lane: Jacked Up: The Inside Story of How Jack Welch Talked GE into Becoming the Worlds Greatest Company

Women; Don't Get Mad at Work

Women pay a high price for losing their cool at work.

When men blow their tops at work, they appear authoritative, but women are penalized for such behavior, a new study finds.  Research published in the March 2008 issue of Psychological Science, about 400 male and female professionals watched video dramatizations of botched office situations.  When women got angry, they were overwhelmingly seen as incompetent, out of control, and worth less pay than their male counterparts.  As for men who got mad: "People assume it's reasonable," says study co-author Victoria Brescoll, a Yale University researcher. 

When they explained why they got angry, women gained points and men lost them--they appeared weak.  Debra Condren, author of Ambition Is Not a Dirty Word, says that to avoid the anger penalty, women should stay calm at work and use humor, which "can be disarming," when vexed.

Source: BusinessWeek, April 21, 2008